First date,大家應該都有經驗,不過對於有些人來說,it’s all they ever have.

曾經有個朋友把first date比喻為試車,如果一切沒問題,那之後就可能有交易,如果中間有任何一點感覺不對,那麼也甭想成交了,哪怕只是”座椅坐起來不舒服”之類的小問題。

我覺得這樣比喻的其實還蠻恰當的。


只不過問題是,要怎樣才能everything feels right?

你可以在氣氛不錯的餐廳共進晚餐,你可以一起看場浪漫的電影,甚至,你可以直接像電影一樣地,開車到淡水或哪裡的碼頭,漫步在沙灘上。

不過不管怎麼樣,there comes to a point how you gonna end it?

Another word, after a nice meal and some decent chat, what’s next?

這個問題,除了跟個人價值觀與行為形態有關係外,跟文化顯然也有很強烈的關係。

所以諸如,該不該送一方回家,該不該kiss goodbye,該不該stay for more?
這一串的選擇,都在在影響著整趟的”試乘”。


不過在我的想法裡,我一直以為,在first date之後會邀對方回家的情節,只出現在好萊塢電影裡,即使我知道for us, having sex is much easier than heterosexual..

But obviously I’m wrong! I’m totally wrong!!

從我出國後的連續五次dating裡沒有任何一個人不嘗試地把我帶回家看來,顯然在gay culture裡頭,getting laid is one of the dating rule for the first date!
那怕,我在dating前已經先警告過對方,我是中國人,不來好萊塢那套的!!似乎到了國外,這樣的台詞只更變成sex up your date的助興劑,變成大家都想挑戰的尺度。


於是我不禁開始納悶,is dating a long lost art? Is there anybody that cherishes the plain happiness from dating? Or, is getting laid really part of the dating nowadays?

Am I the last dinasor or should I get evolution?


最後我決定告訴每個想要date我的人:

Please make sure you are not the kind that wants to get laid in the first date or two. Let’s face it, sex is a pill. How am I supposed to know you’re simply horny, you like me only by apprearance, or I’m really attracted to you by personality and what’s in my brain?

I might not get as many dates as I used to, but at least I don’t have to worry about ”what’s next?”.

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